Hurray! You are getting married in ten to twenty days! Do not procrastinate on these items.
__Acquire marriage license from same state in which you marry: put this in a very safe place and be sure to present it to your officiant before the ceremony.
__Pick or write your wedding vows: serious and/or funny, it is too stressful to leave the writing of personal vows to the night before, which is what many of my couples confidentially inform me they did–and rather regret.
__If you desire special rites or readings in the ceremony, select them. Also inform your officiant who will do the readings – or if the officiant will read the passages. Keep in mind that not all are comfortable with reading in public, but may hesitate to decline the honor.
__Confirm with any vendors (put the place, date, and time in the subject heading of e-mail)
__Confirm times with important guests (tell guests to come 15-30 minutes before ceremony starts)
__If you are planning to exchange rings, make sure you purchase them in advance. Do think carefully about the type and any engravings. But remember that the symbolism will ultimately transcend whether it’s gold or platinum–custom or simple.
__Consider logistics: make sure you have great directions prepared just in case they’re needed
__If you are having a wedding party, work out the choreography details
__Make all decisions about the music, video, photo needs, and flowers
__Seriously consider pre-paying everything; many vendors (musician to photographer) require all paid in advance for good reason: it’s kind of tacky to request payment, especially with larger weddings.
And then move onto the details of the clothing and such.